Gonna Give All My Secrets Away
by VampiresKiss09
Summary: Damon finds Elena in desperate need of help.  Teaching her some control and keeping her secret from her family and friends will be the hardest part, but it brings them closer than ever. Work in Progress.
1. Chapter 1

"I'll see you tomorrow guys." Elena stood from the table and waved with a smile. "Thanks for dinner." Bonnie, Jeremy and Caroline all said goodbye, wishing she would have stayed for the band but she just wasn't feeling up to it tonight.

She sighed walking out of the restaurant. Her breath hung in the air, it was a cold night in mystic falls. Her boots clicked on the sidewalk as she made her way home where she had plans to cozy up to her nice warm bed with a teddy bear and fall asleep. Someone had other plans for her, however.

She heard the wooshing sound of a vampire behind her and that's all she remembered until the next night when she was waking in a familiar bed, but it most certainly wasn't her own.

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><p>Damon was on his way to Mystic Grill for a round of drinks when he heard a scream; an all too familiar scream. He knew in an instant that it was Elena and he darted off in the direction it was coming from with vampire speed.<p>

When he arrived at the scene, Damon's eyes grew wide with shock and sadness. Elena was down on the ground with blood stained onto her shirt. He knelt down beside her and felt for a pulse; he was too late.

Sadness washed over him at the sight of her laying on the pavement lifeless and cold. He was angry at himself for letting this happen to her. If only he had been here 30 seconds sooner, he could have saved her life. Picking up her limp and emotionless body, he slowly made his way back to the boarding house.

Upon arriving there, he was very thankful they were alone. Stefan took off with Katherine and Rebecca was still as good as oak-tree-daggered dead. The house was silent as could be as Damon ascended the stairs to his bedroom where he layed Elena on his bed. He sat beside her and looked at her for what felt like forever before placing his head in his hands and sobbing. He blamed no one but himself.

When he was able to pull himself from his place beside her, he began to prep the room for her transition. He placed a few blood bags on the dresser along with a nightgown of Rebecca's so she could change out of her ripped and bloodied clothes. For the sake of sparing her any harsh lights, he lit some candles around the room. Once he was satisfied with his preparation, he lay beside her in his bed caressing her hair and waiting for the first sign of her new "life".

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><p>Damon was beside her when her eyes opened, breath filling her lungs as she gasped and coughed. He sat up and observed her, giving her a moment to regain full consciousness. She looked around the room, figuring out where she was at last. "Damon...?" She questioned as she looked at him. "Why am I in your bed? Did we... oh god, what did we do?"<p>

Damon wished that the worst thing they had done in her eyes was sleep together. "Hey." He spoke so softly, knowing her senses were beginning to heighten even before she drank blood to complete the last phase of turning. "We didn't do anything, I promise you." In the back of his mind he still kept wishing that that was all that was wrong with her world.

"So then why am I here?" She looked confused beyond words and her stomach growled. She ignored it.

"We need to talk." He rose from the bed and went to his dresser to grab the night gown and handed it to her. "First change out of those clothes." He requested as he walked back to the dresser to prepare her a glass of blood and divert his eyes from places they didn't need to gaze upon right now.

She didn't protest the clean clothes, hers were absolutely a mess. Damon turned around holding a glass which Elena just assumed was for him until he sat beside her once more and handed it to her. "I'm sure you know how this works by now..." He didn't know what else to say to her, or how else to break the news.

"No..." Was all she could manage as she stared into the glass of blood. "I would rather die!" She shoved the glass back at him, almost spilling it all over him. She flew up off of the bed and crossed the room to the door which Damon had already bolted locked for fear that this is how she might react. "Let me out, Damon Salvatore or I swear I will.."

He was in front of her then, holding her shoulders tightly. "You will not leave this room and you will drink this blood if I have to chain you down and pour it down your throat with a funnel." He was very stern and his eyes were serious.

"Damon..." tears began to flow down her cheeks. "...I don't want to be a vampire. Why would you do this to me!" She was hysterical but didn't physically struggle with him.

He was taken aback by the confusion. "Elena, you think I did this to you?" He shook his head, taking her hand and leading her back to sit on the bottom of his bed with him. "When I found you, you were laying on the sidewalk. I brought you here because I knew what happened. You had blood on your mouth and your neck was broken. I brought you here so you could at least wake up with someone who can hold your hand through it all." He explained.

Elena was crying now. "How could I have been so careless? Damon, I'm scared. I don't want this, but.." Damon took her into his arms. ".. I don't want to die, either." Damon strained to keep his own tears from falling, he felt so sad for her and wished he could reverse this horrible thing that was about to happen to her.

"I'll help you get through this." His voice was soothing. "Elena, knowing you has been one of the very best parts of my existence. Maybe it's selfish to choose you being a vampire over death, but I just can't lose you. Not after everything we've been through." He never thought that letting his humanity back in would be so worth it and so difficult to bear at the same time; if he could keep Elena in his life, he would never turn it off again.

"I don't want to lose you, either." She sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve, then laughed. "How human of me to do something so gross." She was laughing through her tears as she realized all things she would never do again as a living, breathing human being.

The past few years have been completely crazy. She learned about vampires, werewolves and witches. Elena had seen ghosts, watched her loved ones die and met her doppelganger. Falling in love with Damon's brother Stefan had been one of the most difficult things she went through; he broke her heart in so many ways regardless of how hard she fought for him. Her love for Stefan brought her closer to the man who was now holding her in his arms, readying her for the most undesired but important change of her life.

He raised the glass close to her mouth. "If you don't drink this soon, you will die, Elena." She looked deeply into his eyes, silently pleading him to take care of her; she gave a slight nod of her head and Damon tipped the glass just a little and she began to drink. First she was completely appalled by the taste and it became less and less gross as she drank. Taking the glass from Damon's hands she finished the rest with a new found hunger that she didn't understand in the slightest.

Damon took the empty glass from her and placed it on the floor. "Lay with me." He said, as he scooted up on his bed and rested his head on his pillow. Elena followed him and lay on her side, facing him. She ran her tongue over her fangs, feeling their danger-some sharpness. Damon took her right hand in his left as they lay observing one another. "You get used to them." He said.

"I feel like the same person still." She replied. The only difference being that she was acutely aware of everything surrounding her; every scent, every sound and every texture. She felt the complexity of the softness of the sheets on his bed and Damon's hand was like a fire holding hers, the same fire which now ravaged through her entire body.

"You will feel like you as long as you don't shut off everything human about yourself." A lock of Damon's hair fell over his eye. "You saw what happened to Stefan when he let himself slip away entirely."

Elena focused on a wrinkle in the fabric of his shirt, her eyes unable to continue looking at him when he mentioned Stefan. She felt overwhelming sadness over her long lost love. "You never let it happen to you, why is that? Why didn't you ever completely let go?"

"I have watched so many vampires go to that dark place. I actually liked who I was before becoming a vampire and holding on to whatever was left of that person was important to me. You can't keep all of it, but what you can keep a firm grasp on, you should."

She looked up at him again with a sweet little smile. "Thanks, Damon. For finding me before I woke up." Their fingers interlocked perfectly and his ring was cool against her skin. His eyes were so blue, it made her feel so tired laying there admiring them.

"You're welcome." He offered a tight lipped smile, not really pleased that he had to make the decision that he did. "Why don't you rest? We can talk more in the morning." She nodded and closed her eyes, together in his bed they both fell into a deep slumber.

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><p>Damon began to dream. He wasn't very sure of what was going on in his dream other than that he was laying face up in his bed with his legs crossed over one and another. A feeling of bliss washed over him, he reached up to his neck where the feeling originated when in an instant he awoke and pinned Elena to the mattress. "Stop!" He yelled. Looking down onto her face, her dark, malevolent eyes and her bloody fangs hurt him so much. "Elena, stop!" He raised his voice again as she writhing around under his grasp.<p>

She had bit him while he was sleeping, luckily he awoke before she could rob him dry of all of his blood. It would have sent her into an even greater frenzy than she was already in. Her features relaxed and she focused on him and realized what she did. She began to cry again. "Damon, I'm so sorry, I couldn't control it."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

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><p>Still keeping her pinned by the shoulders under his weight, he watched her. He was nervous that it would be difficult for her to find control and he seemed to be right, he was just glad it was he that she fed on and not a human. "It's okay, Elena, just calm down, force back your fangs." Damon demanded as he watched as she struggled to stop crying and retract her fangs at the same time but she succeeded after a few minutes of trying.<p>

Damon released her of his grasp, putting his hands above her shoulders now, still observing her face intently, his eyes piercing hers. He spoke soothingly "You need to focus." he brushed her wild and tangled hair away from her face. Pushing himself up and off the bed, he went to the dresser and poured a glass of blood.

Elena watched with curiosity from her position on his bed as he brought the glass over to her. "I want you to hold this and do not take as much as a drop." she gripped the glass tightly, her fangs made their way back full force. She looked up at him.

"Damon, it's so hard." there was a strain in her voice as she mentally begged her fangs to go away. She did not want to disappoint him for fear that that would only make him challenge her in more difficult ways.

"You can do this." he encouraged, his voice still smooth and quiet. He was going to find and kill whoever did this to her and if it meant he had to die too, then sobeit.

She shifted and stared at the blood and glanced to Damon then back to the blood. She made up her mind and slammed the blood down on the night stand, a few drops splashing out of the glass and landing on the dark cherry wood; and her fangs were gone. She turned to find Damon smiling proudly at her. "I did it." she said in a small voice.

He was wearing his signature Damon half-grin as he embraced her in a hug. Her arms went instinctively around his shoulders. "Don't worry, Elena, we'll get through this together. I won't let you lose who you are." He would still love her just as strongly, vampire or not.

His voice was the only thing keeping her grounded. She knew she needed to hold on to herself, find the strength to keep being the person she has always been. With her head so close to his neck, she could hear his blood coursing through his arteries and her fangs were straining to just sink into his neck to create a passage for his delicious, warm blood to flow into her mouth. This was Damon, though. Damon, the man who was taking the time to take care of her, to make absolutely certain that she would conquer these new instincts and stand strong. "Damon, could I use your shower? I feel disgusting." She felt like if she could just wash away the filth and blood on her skin that she could feel like herself again and get on with this adapting thing that she so desperately needed to do.

"Of course." He stood and pulled her up by the hand and pulled her close to him so his face was only inches from hers. "I need you to give me your word that you will not leave this room. I'm going to go to your house and get some of your clothes and I'll get some warm blood ready for you when I get back."

Elena nodded, it was interesting how aware she was of his vampire essence now that she was also one. Moreso, the scent of his cologne intoxicated her and she smiled. "I promise, I won't leave." To be honest about it, she didn't want to go anywhere. There wasn't another vampire who she would rather be with right now, not even Stefan. She wasn't allowing herself to think of Stefan because it just made her unhappy and angry.

Damon left quickly through the window, he snuck into Elena's bedroom successfully avoiding being detected. He gathered a bag of jeans and tops that he chose based mostly on what he thought would look good on her. He took a few other things like make up and a hair brush and also had a little bit of a thrill in choosing her under garments. He darted back out her window and headed back to his house. He had ran there so he took a few back roads to make the route quicker, from the corner of his eye he thought he saw someone and stopped dead in his tracks. He glanced around carefully but he saw no one and continued on his way.

When Damon returned to the house he came back in through his window to avoid undoing the security he had constructed on his door. He tossed the bag on his bed and turned around to find Elena standing in the bathroom door way wearing nothing but one of his white towels. He couldn't remove his eyes, no matter how hard he tried to force himself.

Elena looked at him and then to the floor shyly as her hand gripped the top of the towel to keep it in place. Her hair hung loosely and wet around her. With her head still tilted downward, she looked up at him with only her eyes. "Got my stuff?"

Her voice snapped him out of his stupor and he turned quickly to grab her bag. In his current state and haste to grab her bag, he knocked the glass of blood off of the night stand and it shattered, the blood spreading across the floor. He froze, pissed at himself for what he had done. He looked up at Elena to see her crouched in the door way gripping the door frame, fangs bared as she tried to control her urge to lick every speck from the floor boards.

Rushing to her side, he fell to his knees in front of her blocking her view of the blood. He knew she could still smell it but at least it was out of sight. "It's alright, Elena, just breathe through the craving." he grabbed her face with his hands to force her to look at him. She breathed heavily as his calm face brought her back to Earth and her fangs retracted once more.

"This is killing me, Damon." She collapsed forward into his chest and he held her there as she wept audibly. Part of him wished he had let her die that night, let her go to a more peaceful place than this. When she finally looked up she scrambled to wipe the tears from her face. Damon took hold of her hands to steady them.

"Shh..." he stood slowly and helped her up with him. He retrieved her bag and set it on the sink in the bathroom. She looked at him pleading for something and he gripped the door knob. "Get dressed, I'll clean this up." he said gently as he closed the door behind him.

Damon cleaned up the mess on the floor and he prepare her a glass of warm blood as he promised but it was only half full. She needed to learn to portion herself now so she would be able to control herself around humans.

When Elena came out of the bathroom she was only in a pair of sweat pants and a t shirt. She wanted to just feel comfortable and she was thankful he brought them for her. She sat on the bed beside him with her arms crossed feeling vulnerable.

Damon held the glass of blood in both hands as he handed it to her. "Drink slowly, this is it for a while." he said while handing it to her. She extended her hand nervously and took the glass from him. Placing it to her lips she felt the hunger surge through her as the first sip entered her mouth. She pulled the glass away for a moment and started again. She finished it over about 5 minutes time. "Thanks." she said, wanting more.

"You can have more in a few hours." He stated.

Elena sighed and leaned her head on his shoulder. She felt comfort in being close to him, he put his arm around her shoulder comfortingly. She felt something else she didn't understand, she wanted Damon in ways she never thought she would ever want him. Thankfully that feeling was easier to push aside than her blood thirst. For now.

The next day, Damon decided to risk letting her out of the bedroom so she wouldn't feel caged in his room like an animal. He sat with her as she read books on the sofa, she read about vampire history and habits and how the brain worked differently than when being human. It overwhelmed her but it was good information to have. She looked at Damon who was sitting calmly beside her staring at his boots. She put her hand over his as it rested on the couch beside him. Their eyes met then, neither said anything, they just gazed at one another. Damon remembered being brand new and what it felt like. He sympathized with her right now, the way she wanted blood, sex and to rip out someone's throat for no reason. It was a thousand times worse than being a hormonal teenager.

"Damon.." She squeezed his hand and leaned closer to him, her lips feeling drawn to his. Her face overtook a crushed and confused expression when he leaned away from her.

"I know how you're feeling and you know I love you and would love more than anything to kiss you..." he slid sideways to look at her, one leg bent on the couch and the other still on the floor. He took her hand in both of his. "But I don't want you to do something you'll regret and I don't want to feel like I'm taking advantage of the desires you feel like you can't control." It saddened him a little that she only wanted him now because of her vampire side effects.

Elena sat back with a sigh. She knew he was right but she didn't completely believe that her attraction to him was because of being a vampire. He had been so good to her the past few days and she really did owe him her life. On the other hand, she thought, a relationship would probably just complicate things right now. She stood from the couch and walked back over to the wall of books to search for another to read, Damon simply followed her with his eyes.


End file.
